My girlfriend seems uncomfortable when I try to do something sexual with her. ?

She's too serious, or she doesn't want to do anything sexual with her, she looks at me with disdain.

Other couples are kissing and going beyond that, but nothing is happening with us.
I wonder if she likes me.

KE

Keith Morris

2 Feb, 2022


2 Answers


Grace Howard

Psychologist

It's great to be able to spend time together as a couple with the person you love, and I understand why you want to see, talk, and touch each other so much.

However, there is one thing that I think is important.

You, her, me, and other people all have different ideas and values about how to deal with the person we are dating. Just as each person has different favorite foods and hobbies, each person has a different way of dealing with others.

So, the way you want to be with someone and the way she wants to be with you may be a little different. Of course, I think there is some overlap.

Let's talk about our true feelings, what is different and what is overlapping between the two of us.

Then, you can find a way to be comfortable with each other.

As time goes by, your feelings will probably change again, so you can talk about it with her again and change the way you interact together.

In the same way with sex, you should talk about your honest feelings with her and try to sort out what you want to do and what you don't want to do.

Then, ask yourself, "How much can we do together now? How much do we want to do?" I don't want to do it right now.

Don't just impose your own feelings because you want to do it right now (that would be violence). That's the point.


CH

Christina Morgan

Sex Therapist

You want to move on, but you're frustrated because you don't know how your partner feels. 

Why don't you tell your partner just that? Then you can talk to your partner about why he doesn't like it and what kind of communication would make him want to live with you.

Maybe he's not ready, maybe he's not comfortable with skinship or sexuality, maybe he doesn't want to do it, or maybe he had a bad experience in the past.

They may be too shy to answer you at first, but it would be nice if they could see that it is important to you and that you want to have a good relationship with your partner.

I thought it would be nice if we could talk openly with each other so that we could move forward and devise ways to take care of each other's thoughts and comfort.

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